Why Do Christians Need a Godly Friend?

Part of our physical, mental, and emotional development is community. Humans by nature are social creatures, babies must be held their first few months or they become infantile. Children not introduced and taught how to share, speak, and act kindly towards other children, lack manners, communication skills, and respect for others. Elderly people slowly lose their minds, if they’re tossed aside or forgotten by family members. Regardless of the person’s age, all people need human interaction.  As much as the current culture preaches about “cutting people off,” or “removing all the fakers,” from our lives, can we honestly say we don’t need friends.

Nope. We do need friends. In today’s world, everyone wants the testimony to say how they transformed themselves. That they’re a successful, self promoted human being naturally motivated, gifted, and relentless. Untrue. There is no such thing as a self-made person. In every step of the way, a person whether they want to admit it or not, has been helped by a family member, friend, teacher, pastor, employer etc.

Especially, Christians we need godly friends in our lives. Moses is a prime example of a Christian figure supported by his friends and relatives. If you have a vague or basic knowledge of Moses, here are a few facts. 

  1. Moses was an Israelite, raised by the Egyptians.
  2. Moses was aware God chose him to deliver His chosen people.
  3. Moses killed an Egyptian worker, and spent 40 years in the desert.
  4. Moses saw the burning bush. He spoke to God.
  5. Moses went back to Egypt with AARON, his brother to deliver God’s people from pharaoh’s evil hand.

Hmm…did you catch that? Moses returned to Egypt with his brother, Aaron. I know if you saw the film, Prince of Egypt  Zipporah went with him to Egypt. Wrong. According to the Word of God, Moses returned to Egypt with his eldest brother, Aaron, also a high priest and believer of the one true God. Don’t believe me read the scripture!

14 Then the Lord’s anger burned against Moses and he said, “What about your brother, Aaron the Levite? I know he can speak well. He is already on his way to meet you, and he will be glad to see you. 15 You shall speak to him and put words in his mouth; I will help both of you speak and will teach you what to do. 16 He will speak to the people for you, and it will be as if he were your mouth and as if you were God to him. 17 But take this staff in your hand so you can perform the signs with it.” (Exodus 4:14-17)

In the moment, the Lord God assigned Moses, a godly friend who had a purpose and a set of instructions. God assigned Moses divine help because he revealed to the Lord his timidity and fear, this proves we cannot fulfill the purposes of God without godly assistance. If Moses, one of God’s anointed leaders, prophets needed help then how much more does a Christian need to have a friend? There are five crucial reasons of why we need a godly squad, a set of friends or at least one friend we can pray and share with.

Let us take a closer look at the story of the Israelites defeating the Amalekites. If you know anything about the Israelites, God’s chosen people, then you know the Israelites had tons of enemies (Hittites, Girgashites, Amorites, Philistines, Jebusites etc…) The story reads:

Exodus 17:8-12 “8 The Amalekites came and attacked the Israelites at Rephidim. Moses said to Joshua, “Choose some of our men and go out to fight the Amalekites. Tomorrow I will stand on top of the hill with the staff of God in my hands.” 10 So Joshua fought the Amalekites as Moses had ordered, and Moses, Aaron and Hur went to the top of the hill. 11 As long as Moses held up his hands, the Israelites were winning, but whenever he lowered his hands, the Amalekites were winning.12 When Moses’ hands grew tired, they took a stone and put it under him and he sat on it. Aaron and Hur held his hands up—one on one side, one on the other—so that his hands remained steady till sunset. 13 So Joshua overcame the Amalekite army with the sword.” (Exodus 17:8-12)

First, we notice the enemies of the Israelites attacked the Israelites at Rephidim. As Moses often led God’s chosen people they were sometimes attacked out of nowhere, they were ambushed, taken prisoner or sometimes it was an official declaration of war. Either way as a Christian, you will be attacked by your enemies. This is a guarantee. The Lord won’t always give you a heads up, and you may be unaware, but the truth is this: You should always be prepared and know how to respond when you are attacked by the enemy.

The Christian has three enemies:

  1. The Flesh (our sin nature, our flesh is always tempting us to give into sinful desires)
  2. The World (Jesus and His disciples consistently spoke about not loving this world, not following the world, because the world’s ways are wicked. Also unbelievers, anyone who is born again is of the world. )
  3. Satan (the devil is a thief, the accuser, he is an enemy of God and God hates him)

In this scenario we would classify the Amalekites as the world, because anyone who does not receive Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior is apart of the world. They are an unbeliever.

The first reason of why we need a godly friend or  squad is to increase the Kingdom of God. Notice Moses gave immediate directions to Joshua, his apprentice. Moses said to “Joshua to choose some of our men and go out to fight the Amalekites.” Moses gave Joshua a responsibility, a job to carry out. Moses did not assert his humanly might as leader of the Israelites. Quite the opposite, Moses relied on the strength and know how of his subordinate Joshua to do one job while he performs the other. Apart of having a godly friend/squad, is to first for ourselves be a friend. How many of us are true friends? Faithful, loyal, when someone tells us a secret do we keep their words hidden in our hearts like we promised. When our friends speak, do we stop and listen and take genuine interest in their lives. Another crucial aspect of having a godly friend/squad is allowing God to use us and them for increasing His Kingdom and the winning of His battles. We cannot be a godly squad if we do not recognize we all have a part to play and a responsibility. Taking charge of someone else’s responsibility, ruins the opportunity for someone to grow in Christ, and destroys any chance of developing a team.

Next, the reason why we need a godly friend is we need Godly advice. Godly advice means it is divine, heavenly advice coming from the spirit of God Himself. It is not wisdom found on Earth, but given to us by the Holy Spirit. Proverbs 12:15 says,

“The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, But a wise man is he who listens to counsel.”

Everyone thinks he or she is always correct in every situation. No one likes to be proven wrong or made a fool in a conversation, relationship, and especially not in front of their peers. Yet a fool never considers if they ever are wrong, even when the fool possesses little knowledge about a particular topic or subject. They’re wrong, you’re right! On the contrary, the wise man behaves and responds differently than the fool. The wise man’s perspective is not to seem the smartest but to make the smartest decisions according to their situation. The wise man humbles himself and prepares his heart to receive the wisdom of his elders and Christian peers. I have had women in my past, years older than me giving me wisdom about how to handle a particular situation. I didn’t know how to handle my stressful job as a teacher, I didn’t know how to respond to a guy I liked. Thankfully, I knew people who had similar experiences in their past. Growing up, listening is key to spiritual growth, and if we want to get somewhere, acquiring wisdom from peers is apart of it.

Third, we need a godly friend for Godly Support/Encouragement. This means we give our friends an opportunity to help us, and when this opportunity arises we do not tell them “no,” or “I can do it.” On our part it is recognizing when we need help. Sometimes, we need financial assistance, a loan of money or some bills paid. A true friend does not keep record of their friend’s account, instead a godly friend focuses on God providing their needs. A godly emotional supportive friend prays consistently for their hurting friend. Unlike, worldly support/encouragement a godly friend does not seek earthly means to heal a spiritual power.  Godly friends know where restoration, healing, and comfort comes from God. A godly friend acknowledges alcohol, drugs, sex, another relationship is not the way to be healed. 

This is why it is essential for us to rely on our godly friends. It builds solid friendships, strong roots, and you never know what this person can offer you. Moses needed Joshua to fight the physical battle against the Amalekites on the ground, while him and Aaron and Hur fought the spiritual battle in the sky. Moses knew his limitations he could not do both, he could only do what God have provided him to do. As his arms  started to grow weary, and he could not extend his arms to the sky any longer, Aaron and Hur thought of a solution. They found a stone for Moses to sit on, adjusting his position, and held up his arms when he became too tired. These two men worked alongside Moses to accomplish the same goal. They saw their friend was weakening, and did not make fun of his weaknesses or abuse his trust, believing helping their friend was worth it.

Additionally, Christian people are not always right. A godly friend is needed to correct and chastise the sin in our lives. Being a child of God, does not guarantee a perfect Christian life. Life is unfair. Often people do not always get their way and they lash out. Relationships crumble, homes fall apart, jobs are lost, sometimes the  consequences we face are the actions from the sins we cherish in our own lives. The Holy Spirit convicts our hearts, showing the extent of our sinful actions, yet we do not always respond or confess our sins to God. Thankfully, a godly friend will lovingly take a person aside and correct his or her irrefutable behavior. A godly friend chastises a friend, not to abuse their friendship or make the person look bad, but the intention is to help them grow. Godly correction is an aspect no one can neglect. Blinded by sin, not everyone can perceive what they are doing is wrong or harmful to the Lord in the moment. Sin clouds judgment. Sin strengthens denial. 

Galatians 6:1 says, “Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted.”

It does not feel good when we are caught in a sin. Embarrassment and shame overcome us, but the intentions of a godly friend is to restore and not destroy. They are more concerned about our spiritual wellbeing, rather than hurting our feelings and making us feel good.

Finally, we need godly companionship because having friends is fun. Seriously? I know you didn’t expect this to be the final point, but I think having friends is underrated. Our cultures believes it is better to be cold and lonely than to take risks and create new friendships. The stronger the bond, the greater experience! When tragedy and adversity strikes and they will, laughter is the best medicine. Laughing through tears, laughing through pain! These friendships are slow to build; they resemble steady heart beats. Isolated, you cannot really crack jokes and converse by yourself, companionship helps us to share our experiences and unite in spirit. We find ourselves in others and they in us. 

Friends come to our weddings, baby showers, funerals, they support our businesses, books, and come to our children’s games and movie nights. Sometimes, they are our greatest supporters, standing on the side lines cheering us on. Yes, several things are great to do alone, but even Jesus acknowledged the beauty in having friends. For it is true a friend is someone who sticks closer than a brother. A friend enriches life’s experiences and when we look back we can never imagine those friends not in our friends. 

A man who has friends must himself be friendly,[a]
But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. (Proverbs 18:24)

A Prayer for Those Who Want a Godly Friend

Dear Gracious Lord and Heavenly Father, lead me to a godly friend. A friend who will support me, encourage me, correct me in the spirit of gentleness, and most importantly a friend, after your own heart. It is my desire for me to show this person Christ in my walk and together we shall share many laughs. Lastly I know I cannot fulfill your purpose on my own Lord, and I trust in You and rely on the strength of others. I pray this in Jesus Name Amen.

Hello everyone, I hope you enjoyed this blog post about the reasons why we all need a godly friend! I hope your encouraged to keep your friendship going strong! Please comment below and don’t be afraid to share! 🙂

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