Aforemention

Blessings everyone! As the summer is winding down, I could not help but look over my past journal entries, while I attended Michigan State University. Some of them inspired me to share the spiritual insights, I gained through my break up, depression and ups and down. This in one in particular reminds me of how little the world can fill the emptiness in our hearts and what the true purpose of mankind is. I pray you receive wisdom and understanding. Peace, Beloved.

November 21st, 2015

This chapter of Crazy Love by Francis Chan has my mind buzzing and my spirit energized. There is so much to write about and I hope to record all of my feelings, questions, theories and nuances before I get sleepy. Chapter 2 of the devotional gave me a reality check I needed and it hit me right in the chest. Honestly I was long overdue for another “life is not about you” spiel and yet I had no idea where or whom it was coming from. This time it came in the form of death, Chan used two stories about Christians who lived their lives for Christ and died unexpectedly. Now it has me reprioritizing my thoughts and the way I live my life. From who’s perspective am’ I living this life from? Mine or God’s. Is the purpose, my purpose, I been called to fulfill has it or is it being fulfilled? Is the way I worship God, the way He wants me to worship Him collectively and personally (intimately) being fulfilled? There is so much to do and so little time. Our life is but a blimp on this earth, in this world. We live and we die. In a flash and in the span of eternity in heaven or hell it means absolutely nothing. I was called to love God that is my personal (intimate) purpose.

There is the notable song by the wonderful song-tress and Motown diva, Minnie Ripperton “Loving you.” I hear the lyrics play through my mind and recall the chorus like water, “Loving you is easy because your beautiful. Making love with you is all I want to do.”  The song is so simple and Minnie’s soft, sweet voice makes the song a musical delicacy and delight to my ear. The same harmony and joy, I receive listening to the song is the same way the Lord God wants me to make Him feel everyday. Adoration, the colors the thrill of constantly making love, being all around the clock wife-y, not a single moment or second wasted giving another object the Lord’s affection. Yep that is my purpose, God gave this purpose to me at a young age, but I must pause and explain my theory, which now I believe is no longer a theory, but a revision and re-visitation of a spiritual truth that is slowly emerging to me.

I believe the Lord God has given many spiritual purposes to human kind. Our foremost purpose is the reason for our existence. Humankind was and is created to worship the Lord God. Our reason and purpose for living is not for or about us. We were created for the greatest purpose in all of history! To worship Him with our bodies, our hearts, our minds, to let every action or deed we perform give glory to the King of kings.

Although the world fails to acknowledge God and seek to erase His existence, the Bible clearly states humanity’s purpose for living. Revelation 4:11 illustrates every creation’s purpose is to give God glory. We are apart of creation, in Genesis, God created the heavens, the earth, nature, and human beings. We are created beings and therefore fall underneath the category of creation. In this scene apostle John witnesses creation praising and worshiping the Lord in the throne room of heaven. There he sees a winged beast giving praises to the Lord and then twenty four elders, dressed in royalty tossing their crowns to the Lord declaring how great and majestic He is. They cry out continuously,

“You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honor and power, for you created all things, and by your will they were created and have their being.” (Rev 4:11)

That is our overall purpose. Our human collective purpose, we are to worship the Lord, giving Him the honor and praise He so rightly deserves. What I am referring to are the underlining purposes we receive individually from the Holy Spirit. These purposes are not the ministries we are called to necessarily but these purposes are each our own, special, intimate forms of worshipping the Lord. The best way I can clarify this theory is to use myself as an example. My ministry is teaching, I adore teaching. I love the look I see on the faces of all my students: toddlers, middle school children, young adults, adults, the elderly. I have had the privilege to teach all ages and God has given me the honor to continuously be His vessel every Sabbath for Sunday School. I love it.

Though this ministry I know the Lord God receives the glory when I teach. I know when people see me, they actually see Christ working and moving in me. This is not the purpose I have been called for. This is not the intimate purpose that has been calling to and from my heart. This is my ministry, by which Faith Fellowship is able to utilize me to disciple new believers, yes God receives the worship because during those moments I am a living sacrifice but this isn’t the personal purpose. My personal purpose is found simply in what Jesus has said is the greatest commandment.

“Jesus replied, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.” This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” (Matthew 22:37-39)

Love. Love. Love. Love is everywhere to me. It surrounds me every single day this call to love and the so many unrecognized blessings of being loved by family and friends and even unexpected strangers. It is in this simple command to Love God with every part of myself and then love others is where I found my greatest and most purest worship derives from. The first where I love God. The moment, I spend time reading his word, analyzing every part of scripture, tracing the syllables of His many names, digging up old Greek and Hebrew words is where my redeemed and cleansed heart syncs with His big, holy one. I don’t hunt for knowledge for the sake of knowledge or because I hate to admit it that I have big hole in my heart. That I have an unbelievably large sized insecurity no one knows about and the only thing I believe gives me purpose or makes me rare is that I am a knowledge seeker. No I hunt the knowledge of God because my heart hears a calling across the valley, across the sea, coming from the mountaintop.

Love is my worship form. I am called to love others because I am blessed with so many and I am called to love God because it is by His love I know how to love someone. My life is not about me. Chapter 2 I am grateful I read it. Sometimes or all the time I really do need to be reminded life is not about me. Life is about God. A lot of times I daydream and dream about being the main character in my own story but really this isn’t my story. The greatest illusion Satan has pulled is getting me to believe this life is about me and it is not. I was not created to love myself. I was created to love the Lord and if I really loved Him then I’ll stop living for myself and live to worship the Lord. Because in the end I want God to be proud to have me as a daughter, his princess, his spoiled little girl, and I want Jesus to brag and confess about me and how I lived for Him. In the end I have a lot of work to do, but God you’re oh so worth it.

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