Late Night Conversations with God

Have you ever stopped and wondered, what am’ I doing and where am’ I going? And who am’ I beyond my strengths and weaknesses?  Who is this spirit caked in flesh?

I am all for adventure. I adore films like Lord of the Rings or Harry Potter not for the supernatural experiences. More so, I always adored the tone of those movies, once the opportunity to go on an adventure arrived, the characters beamed with excitement. You can practically hear the violins and flute hum a cheery tune in the background as we gather ourselves to enjoy an unpredictable chapter in our favorite stories.

Yet in January I had a major existential crisis (with a Christian spin), my adventure came to an abrupt halt. The skies wore a dark and somber expression all colors were sucked dry from my vivid imagination. I was stuck in a bleak conundrum.

I thought to myself all the time, what is the point to living life if life is sinful, wicked? Why waste time doing my best on Earth, when heaven is so much grander?

I remember sitting down, being lost in my thoughts like I always do and realize life is not about me. Nothing I do matters or will ever pass unto heaven. There were billions of people before me and will be after me, so is this meager, vapor of a life worth living. Heaven awaits me. Jesus, my Savior is in heaven and how I dream to kiss His hands and feet and to be away from this world.

But I had to learn pain is part of the adventure and before I get the prize there is work to be done on Earth.

As Jesus obeyed God on Earth, He worked with His prize in sight. Jesus did not have eyes cast downward or a slumped don’t-want-to-be-bothered attitude. At each step of Christ’s earthly adventure, He employed a joyful disposition, no work was worth doing more than bringing glory to His Heavenly Father. Likewise, we’re called to adopt heavenly perspectives, to grow in spiritual maturity and not remain spiritual babes or carnal minded believers. While you might babysit the side of the spectrum where Earth brings you temptation to become comfortable here. There is, unfortunately a danger to obsessing so much over heaven, we feel like there is no work to be done on Earth. This is lazy and selfish.

Therefore, right now, close to the stroke of midnight, I am performing a quick inventory of my life. I clearly see it is time for me to live out what has been put within me. I may not like Earth and my circumstances are quite favorable, but to place my feelings over God’s Will is arrogant and disrespectful.

I will obey God.

He is the captain of my sea.

There is so much for me to learn like how to overcome the fear of people or tomorrow or repenting of foul language. I am not perfect and what is greater than getting in heaven is hearing God say, “Well done, my good and faithful servant.”

I know I am good for Christ’s blood covers me. But faithfulness is a title earned by serving God here on Earth. I want to be a servant who made the Master proud. So tonight, I lay to rest something I can’t quite put my finger on, but the Holy Spirit sees my heart. He knows my desires to move forward in passionate obedience. So be in prayer for me and with me, I encourage you to not withhold your service, but jump head first into the deep end.

Because God is the greatest thing we will ever experience and what is most important always deserves our finest effort. 

Oh Heavenly Father, whatever you have called me to do, 

Help me to turn deaf ears to myself and obey you.

Give me courage to carry out every assignment 

To live a godly life according to Jesus Christ’s standard. 


So, how are you moving forward?

Copyright © 2018 by A Meeting at the Well


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